Preparing for Baby

There are many ways you can prepare your child for a new addition to the family.

• Tell your child about the new baby three to four months before giving birth. This way your tummy is showing and it will be easier for your child to imagine that a baby is in there. Telling a young child any sooner may cause your child unnecessary anxiety about the impending birth.
• Let your child feel the kicks and movement baby makes inside your tummy.
• Tell your child about how life will change once baby arrives. Be sure to assure her that you will love her just the same as you do now and that the new baby is not more important, but will require a lot of your attention.
• Sign your child up for a sibling class where he can learn about babies and sharing mom and dad with a new brother or sister.
• Let your child help decorate the nursery. Involve her in color, furniture and decorating decisions. Let her help shop for baby’s supplies, such as diapers, bottles, etc.
• If you will be moving your child to a different bedroom to make room for baby, do so at least three months ahead of the birth. This will give him plenty of time to adjust to his new surroundings and won’t make him feel he has given up something because of the baby.
• Make any changes in your child’s routine well in advance of the baby’s birth so that she does not feel overwhelmed once baby arrives.
• Explain to your child what will happen when you go into labor. Where will he stay while you are in the hospital? If a friend or relative is coming to stay with your child while you are away, have them come stay for the night a week or two in advance.
• Reflect on your older child’s first year of life by showing photographs of her at the hospital, getting her first bath, sitting in her high chair, etc.

After Baby is Born

Once baby arrives, plan a special trip to the hospital so your older child can meet his new brother or sister and see that you are okay. Dad may want to plan a special outing with the older sibling while mom and baby are at the hospital. This can make your older child feel special and loved.

When baby comes home let your older child help out as much as possible. Simple duties such as choosing baby’s outfit or helping sponge baby at bath time can help your older child feel useful.

Set aside special time just for mom and the older sibling. Doing so will let her know that although you cannot give her all of your attention as you could before baby arrived, you will always make special time to spend with her.

Prepare Yourself for Jealousy

Older children will display some jealousy from time to time. Your child may become aggressive at times or withdraw from others. Don’t be surprised if your child hits or throws something at baby. Be prepared to intervene right away so baby does not get hurt. Explain to your child that he is much stronger than baby and his actions could really hurt. If the behavior continues, put him in time out so he can think about what he has done.

After the time out, explain to him that it is unacceptable to act in such a manner. Tell him that is it okay to feel sad that he isn’t getting as much attention as he used to, but that you love him just the same as before.

When to Talk to a Doctor